Finally an OT evaluation...

Well he finally had his eval today. I was under the impression that the OT would work with behavioral issues, but obviously they only work with kids who have specific delays. J only has his speech delay, but other than that I would say he is above average in other areas. She had him to draw a circle and he did. I wasn't surprised b/c we had been working on drawing circles and he picked it up quickly. Then he put together two shapes puzzles and the shape sorter. Again, I wasnt surprised b/c those are the activities I do with him almost daily. He also stacked 9 blocks, his favorite thing to do. So the OT told me that he seems advanced for his age and I said "Oh yes, he's very smart. In fact he can identify almost all of the alphabet." Not many two year olds can do that and I really think J will be an early reader b/c he tries to spell out every word he sees when we go somewhere. But that does not cover up his behavior issues. I explained to her that I cannot take him anywhere in public, especially if there are small kids around, b/c he starts to do this howling scream, he bites, he hits, and he head butts. He also gets so frustrated that he bangs his head on anything hard. At Chuck E Cheese, it was a brick wall. I try to calm him down and it only gets worse. Kicking, screaming, flailing about. Then all we can do is leave, so to avoid that we think it's best to just keep him home. But then the same thing happens when we have smaller kids to come over. I just don't get it and feel like I've lost control of him. She listened to my concerns and told me that Ms. Peggy (J's SLP) has even told her of J's behaviors and how hard of a time I'm having with him. She told me that she will add him to her list and she will start to see him on Mondays as well, but she will work with the feeding issue. I told her that he will also be in feeding therapy soon through the GI, but she wants to come anyway for now to see how he does and to see if she can identify anything else that may be going one with him. But for his behavior he needs to see a behavioral specialist or a social worker. Well the problem with that is that none of the specialists in this area accept Tricare and it will cost us $125 an hour out of pocket. I just started crying b/c from the beginning his behavior was my main concern and then his delayed speech. The speech is certainly getting better, but the behavior is driving me up a wall. Honestly it makes me not want anymore kids :( And you all know how badly I always wanted another. I feel guilty now when we can't take him places with us. We want to do things as a family but we can't b/c of his behavior. I want to be able to participate in playgroups and library storytime, but we can't. He can't tolerate it. So now we are stuck in the system. Towards the end of the eval, J was taking things out of the OT's bag and he found some bubbles, so she wanted to blow them for him. He tried snatching the bubbles and said "Mine." She said "you want bubbles?" and he just kept saying mine and started growling at her and grabbing the bubbles. Then he fell out and started kicking her. I told him "No J. No kicking." He got up and acted like he was going to hug her and of course he head butted her but she moved her head and he got her in the chest. Then he just had a full blown tantrum, throwing himself to the ground, kicking and screaming. So I picked him up to try and calm him down and she saw that there is no calming him down when he's like that. It's like he doesn't even hear me anymore. So I put him down before he gave me another bruise on my face and he crawled over to her, grabbed her leg, and slammed his head against it. I usually have so much patience with kids, and now I feel like I'm losing patience with my own son. The OT said he definitely needs to be seen for that, but she is the wrong person for what he needs. So I'm in touch with a social worker for kids with autism. She can't work with Jayden b/c he does not have a diagnosis of autism, but she gave me the name of someone who could "probably" help him, so I left her a voicemail and I'm waiting for a call back from her. I know we will get through this, it's just been ongoing for so long and I would love to finally see some sort of light at the end of the tunnel.