Please God.

First of all, for the first time in a long time, I feel like I owe myself a pat on the back. This morning has been BEYOND stressful and everything that could go wrong has gone wrong, yet I have been able to keep my cool. Jayden was supposed to go in for his CT scan this morning. He woke up VERY cranky, so I guess I expected it to be a rough day and I immediately became concerned about the CT b/c there was no talk about any type of sedative for him. The pediatrician prescibed a medication that is supposed to help him if he's having headaches and supposedly has a calming effect as well to keep him from getting upset for us to use as needed. I brought it with me just in case b/c I knew he wouldn't lie still for the CT. We get to the radiology center and I'm greeted at the front desk by the receptionist who tells me that they are not in our network for the ins and they cannot do the scan. We just drove 20 minutes to get to the place and Jayden was on the floor screaming. She told me they could send us to another place today that was in our network. I asked if she could send me to someplace that was near there since we'd already drove out there. Jayden had a horribke tantrum, eyes turning red and all, over what I don't know, but I just waited for it to be over and then gave him his blanket and sat him on my lap. I'm so proud of myself for remaining calm. So she gives me mapquest directions to another place that is 20 more minutes away!! Further from my house. I was so distracted by Jayden and just generally frustrated b/c of the situation. We drove the extra 20 minutes. Got into the clinic and had to sign in at registration and pay a $25 deductible. I wrote a check and she sent me back to radiology. The tech asked me if I thought Jayden would lie still. I gave the most honest answer I could. "No." So he says, without pause, "Well we won't be able to do his scan." So I went on to say how I don't understand how anyone can assume a 2 yr old will lie completely still while awake, especially in a strange environment. He tells me that several 2 yr olds lie still and that if Jayden can't lie COMPLETELY still he won't be able to do the scan. So forget about the 30 miles of gas I just wasted, or stress I just put my child through by dragging him in and out of the car. I decided to try the meds the Dr prescribed. I gave him some and we went to wait in the waiting room to see if it would calm him down. Jayden hopped, skipped, jumped, spun around in circles, everything but calmed down. So the tech comes out and is shaking his head "no" saying it's not going to happen. So he tries again to get Jayden to lie on the table. My poor baby was trembling and actually saying that he was scared. That's scary for a 2 yr old!! So the tech calls Jayden's pediatrician to let him know that it's not happeneing. The pediatrician told the tech that I could give Jayden a double dose of the meds he prescribed to try and calm him for the CT and if that doesn't work then he will have to reschedule and have the scan done at the hospital with sedation. Well, I didn't like the feeling I had when I gave Jayden the first dose, so I damn sure wasn't about to give him a second. I said screw it, I'll just wait for it to be rescheduled. So we drive home and Jayden is calm for the ride home but once we get home it's another story. He's screaming at everything and just in a foul mood altogether, probably b/c he was late for his nap. So I fed him his lunch and then as we were going to his room for nap time he had a fit. It started out as a crying fit, then as I was changing his diaper he starts with the growling and tensing up his body. This went on for 10 minutes. I had to put him in his bed and turn out the light b/c he was hurting me and I didn't want him to hurt himself. He finally was able to calm down and I think he's asleep now.

Please God, just help us to help him.